my eyes feel like burning

At one point in my life I thought I liked school. It certainly was not in the middle school years as it was very uncool to like school back then. And God knows I wanted to be cool pretty much more then anything in the whole world. I think I might have even sold one of my siblings to have reached that impossible peak of ultimate coolness. Sorry about that Susan.

And then there was high school. Not all that cool to like school then either but I was starting to get more comfortable with the heavy burden of being a nerd. At least then I could do well and find a crowd that was cool with it. Still I covered up the truth by playing cool sports like soccer and assumed that when the football players yelled, 'hey field fairies' they were talking to the truck guys who hung out around their Fords and Chevys after school.

Then came college and I was ready to jump in. I was going to wear it loud and proud and go for that 4.0. Unfortunately I quickly found out that nerd and really really smart are not the same thing. Freshman nerds take note. But I did okay and graduated without making a scene.

...And now here I stand. About 37 years into grad school and creeping ever so slowly towards a degree that will not help me get a bigger paycheck or aid me in playing in the next World Cup, an 8th grade dream that was stupidly supported by overly optimistic teacher. I now sit here taking a short break from writing yet another paper and wondering when I will ever be done. I still enjoy school, I think, but I am ready to take a class on cooking or Kung-Fu death holds. Just anything that does not mean I have to still live in finals world. Okay time to get back to writing...