Monday, December 12, 2005

what jon needs...

Because all the cool kids are doing it...

What to do:
Go to google and write your name and the word ‘needs’, in quotes — as in “matt needs”. notice the first 10 sensical sentences that come up." here's what i got when i tried "jon needs" ...

1. Jon needs a poke in the other eye. (I did not enjoy the first)
2. Jon needs a new name. (agreed)
3. Jon needs help.
4. Jon needs a consequence for misbehavior; time outs usually work well. (they really do)
5. Jon needs to change his classroom management practices.
6. Jon needs to answer some questions.
7. Jon needs to come out of the closet. (hmm idk)
8. Jon needs to move on.
9. Jon needs to raise about $10000 American dollars in financial backing. (please feel free to send checks or cash)
10. Jon needs change for the bus.

(also at #12: Jon needs lots of support at the home front and elsewhere to help him maintain good boundaries.)

7 Comments:

Blogger cory said...

two things:

1. i always wanted to ask about the jon needs #7, but it is just kind of awkward.

2. could you just get the bus fare from the 10 grand?

Mon Dec 12, 03:25:00 PM  
Blogger Mary said...

awesome. i love this game. jon needs a poke in the other eye is my favorite. lol. ahh, this is a fun game.

Mon Dec 12, 03:25:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes, I've been reading blogs. No, I'm not starting one...yet.

I did the thing with my name and most of what I got were other Jared blogs with their lists. So, rather than focusing on what I need, I thought I'd see what I already have.

1. Jared has large penis. (I know the grammar is incorrect but I'm counting it).
2. Jared has become an international celebrity. (see 1?)
3.Jared has a bat and is beating the hell out of something. (see 1??)
4.Jared has a secret. (see 1?)
5.Jared has appeared in numerous commercials for SUBWAY restaurants. (I hate that guy)
6.Jared has made it clear he only wants to be with Lindsay.
7.Jared has been carrying a picture of his pony around for days!
8.Jared has just recently started walking independently.
9.Jared has puts more and more stress on his brain.
10.Jared has a huge crush on Jessica Simpson.

PS The next one was:
Jared has been offered big
money from Playgirl magazine to pose in the buff. (secrets out I guess)

Tue Dec 13, 07:47:00 PM  
Blogger Jon said...

Jared! Welcome to dorkdome. Good call on the "jared has", much better results. You pervert. Also what prompted you to finally post?

Wed Dec 14, 07:41:00 AM  
Blogger Mary said...

obviously, jared, not that i can speak to the size of your international celebrity, but i will say that the size of the welcome you received on blogger certainly indicates a level of popularity unmatched by any current blogger yet ...

c'mon, you can do it.

Wed Dec 14, 09:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sarah needs to be hooked up to a respirator...

Wed Dec 14, 03:40:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ooo...This is Fun! (I too had several that were from other lists, but skipping those I get:

1. Amanda needs random Stash Enhancement Expeditions. (don't know if that makes sense but it sounded cool)
2. Amanda needs to read Barbara Bush's speech to Wellesley graduates given in 1990. (or not)
3. Amanda needs a wise friend to tell her that this too shall pass.
4. Amanda needs her local food bank to put food on the table for herself and her daughter.
5. AMANDA needs to be rebuilt
6. Amanda needs a family.
7. Amanda needs to avoid dairy.
8. Amanda needs to realize that she can not hold on to her children forever.
9. Amanda needs to educate herself regarding the different roles of an expert witness.
10. Amanda needs to know: Why?

Wow, kind of lame, actually. So sad. I want to be a cool kid too!

Maybe "Amanda has" will give me better results:

1. Amanda Has Olympic Wet Dreams (Yikes!)
2. Amanda has as deadly a hatred of dogs
3. Amanda has mixed feelings about leaving home
4. Amanda has grown taller and now weighs 75 lbs.
5. Amanda has been under the supervision of the national Danish pony trained Vibeke Degn Andersen
6. Amanda has incredible potential
7. Amanda has taken a recent vow not to eat anything green
8. Amanda has had three breast augmentations (really, could have fooled me?)
9.Amanda has appeared in a host of costume dramas including Anna Karenina
10. Amanda has a superbly refined pop sensibility

Okay, so those aren't exactly in order, and certainly not the first 10 sense those were mostly sad and depressing things about hospitals and cancer. These are much better.

Wed Dec 14, 03:45:00 PM  

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