safety blanket
Notes from Honduras…
I very much doubt that I will be able to get online while I am here in Honduras so I will be posting these blogs after getting back home.
It is the end of our first day here and there is a lot going through my head at the moment. Mostly questions that I really have no answer to. Such as, ‘what is the purpose of short-term missions?’ or ‘are they really helpful and the best of resources?’ or ‘how can our team be a reflection of Jesus with so many cultural barriers?’ But I don’t want to write about any of those questions and risk being overwhelmed with what I do not know. I feel that if I dwell on all the questions around me that I will be swallowed up and miss out on actually living.
Instead I want to write why I love being a part of trips like this. I love it because it reminds me to pray. Being a Christian I know that I need to pray. In fact I even enjoy praying most of the time. And yet I don’t do it. I forget. I don’t care. I don’t want to bother God. At least that is what I tell myself. The fact is, I think I am proud and I think I don’t need God. I can do life. I can handle myself and through good team work, lots of discussions, networking and reading the best resources I can figure out just about anything. What a load of crap.
Here in a different culture, I find myself in a world I do not understand. I am often confused and uncomfortable. I think people are talking about me when they are not. My clothing sticks out. I am way too pasty. All this and God’s grace makes me pray. I pray that I would enjoy people, different food, and limited conversations. I pray that I would not be judgmental of what I do not understand. I pray that I would communicate who Jesus is in a way that reflects truth and not just the United States. I pray that I will not just hide in my room until it is time to go home and I pray that I will not forget and drink the water.
Somehow this prayer out of desperation seems healthier than my normal day-to-day life. For now at least I feel like I can’t do life without help. I am pretty sure that is true back home as well and if I did not so easily wrap myself in the blanket of comfort I might be able to feel this intimate with my Abba wherever I go.
I very much doubt that I will be able to get online while I am here in Honduras so I will be posting these blogs after getting back home.
It is the end of our first day here and there is a lot going through my head at the moment. Mostly questions that I really have no answer to. Such as, ‘what is the purpose of short-term missions?’ or ‘are they really helpful and the best of resources?’ or ‘how can our team be a reflection of Jesus with so many cultural barriers?’ But I don’t want to write about any of those questions and risk being overwhelmed with what I do not know. I feel that if I dwell on all the questions around me that I will be swallowed up and miss out on actually living.
Instead I want to write why I love being a part of trips like this. I love it because it reminds me to pray. Being a Christian I know that I need to pray. In fact I even enjoy praying most of the time. And yet I don’t do it. I forget. I don’t care. I don’t want to bother God. At least that is what I tell myself. The fact is, I think I am proud and I think I don’t need God. I can do life. I can handle myself and through good team work, lots of discussions, networking and reading the best resources I can figure out just about anything. What a load of crap.
Here in a different culture, I find myself in a world I do not understand. I am often confused and uncomfortable. I think people are talking about me when they are not. My clothing sticks out. I am way too pasty. All this and God’s grace makes me pray. I pray that I would enjoy people, different food, and limited conversations. I pray that I would not be judgmental of what I do not understand. I pray that I would communicate who Jesus is in a way that reflects truth and not just the United States. I pray that I will not just hide in my room until it is time to go home and I pray that I will not forget and drink the water.
Somehow this prayer out of desperation seems healthier than my normal day-to-day life. For now at least I feel like I can’t do life without help. I am pretty sure that is true back home as well and if I did not so easily wrap myself in the blanket of comfort I might be able to feel this intimate with my Abba wherever I go.
posted by Jon at
1:07 PM
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